my ambivalent attitude

Sunday, May 28, 2006

I nudged my eyes and entered into a state of consciousness yesterday morning to find myself in a backdrop of raised voices and heightened emotions. A mild altercation had broken out between my parents and my elder brother, who was still in bed, over his recent profligacy in his decision to purchase home-used ionic water equipment at a cost of $1,500. It wasn't without reason - apparently, my brother had decided on taking his 3-months holiday respite to make a foray at multi-level marketing, or at least that's what I perceive it to be since I have always turned a blind eye to his matters. (Just don't get embroiled in the quagmire of golden pyramid marketing and he should be ok.) Therefore, he had his manager at our house a few days ago to sell his products and to entertain him, my parents had earlier bought a set of magnetic sleeping system for over 2K. (I don't understand what this business is about but he needed to achieve a certain sales volume to rise to a captain?) To fork out another $1,500 for the ionic water, whose health value still remains dubious, proved to be the last straw for them as they blew their top and lashed out at my brother early in the morning. The indignant remarks made by my brother further compounded the situation, interjections like "I will use my own money!" are specious arguments strewn over with loop-holes.

What's left me perturbed and shaken were the words spoken by my father. It made me more determined to find a sponsor for my university education, to lift their financial burden and reduce my economic dependence on them.

"。。。我很照顾，很珍惜我自己的健康，你知道吗？因为这个家只有我每个月赚那一千几百块，如果我有什么三长两短，这个家就垮了。你们三个都要上大学，我现在只能多赚它七八年，希望一个接一个可以读完大学，出来工作，这就是我的责任。。。"

I shall not divulge much further, and keep in my heart all that he had said. I guess all parents are the same, and their concern and love for their children is unequivocal. Anyway, that left my brother tearing afterwards.

scribbled at 3:50 PM